Being an atheist parent is challenging because I don't want to indoctrinate my children into any particular belief system. I just want them to be freethinkers and make up their minds for themselves. Of course, theists will accuse me of brainwashing my children in the same way as they openly admit brainwashing their children into their preferred flavour of religion. However, there is a big difference between telling them to question what they are asked to believe and telling them what to believe.
This quandary came to mind this morning as I overheard my 8 year old daughter explain to my 6 year old son that our family "is not Christian" (which is true) and "has no religion" (which is equally true). I was quick to jump into the conversation and explain to them both that my wife and I don't tell them what to believe and that they should decide for themselves what to believe.
The truth of the matter is that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. My kids are quite likely to grow up being skeptical of religious faith while the children of theists are more than likely to grow up believing the religious claims of their parents. The difference, I believe, is that fewer children of atheists will shed their skepticism and adopt a religious faith than theist children will drop the religions of their parents. Atheism (or, more accurately, the application of skepticism to religious faith) is not a religion which one can be converted from. There are no atheist apostates. That is not to suggest that atheists never adopt religious beliefs. However, if I was a betting man (and I am), it will be far more difficult to lure one of my kids into the LDS Church [or choose any other religious faith you like and insert it here] than it will be for one of those poor young sods going door-to-door to realize that the Book of Mormon is a myth.
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
Saturday, July 4, 2009
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5 comments:
You take the right approach to your children. Do not hide from them the fact that you do not believe in God; but always make it clear to them that they are free to believe what they want without risk of criticism or persuasion otherwise at home.
I disagree with your comment about fewer atheists turning to religion than vice-versa. We would need to see some research on that point, but I suspect that the vast majority of persons who grow up in a religious home but in adulthood leave behind all the badges (for example, going to Church and reading the Bible) still consider themselves believers in God and definitely not atheists.
I've already seen my kids (ages 6 & 8) benefit from leaving the LDS church. They have a lot of questions now that they wouldn't have even thought of before, having been given the "answers" already in church. Yesterday my son (8) asked me if life would be better if we didn't get sick or die. I told him that I didn't know but that I thought I might get bored if I had to live forever. Then, I asked him what he thought. I think this is key as he builds his own beliefs. He said he didn't know but I could see him thinking about it for a long while after.
My religious extended family sees my reply as cruel. But I see a young boy learning to have an open mind and cope with the realities of life in a healthy way.
This is the best website - how has it taken me so long to come across it?
I imagine a new hire wondering why he comes to work everyday. His supervisor feels that coming to work is good because it means that the worker has money to support his family. The worker stuggles only because the connection to work and his larger purpose is forgotten.
I think that it is confusing to kids to focus only on the day at work. It makes a whole lot more sense to remind them of the larger purpose. It is not noble to despense with truth simple because it makes life more meaningful. Not all crutches are strength.
Rob, I am honoured to have you drop by for a visit.
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