Monday, February 15, 2010

Christianity in a nutshell

You just can't sum it up better than this:


Posted by The Atheist Missionary at 9:08 PM
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9 comments:

  1. *ahem*

    Allow me to fix some minor errors:

    "I'm going to create man and woman with the free will to choose to either obey me or disobey me. Then I will cause Mary to become pregnant with Jesus, the human manifestation of the Son. Once alive, I will allow myself to be killed as a sacrifice so that humans may not have to suffer the consequences of their sinful actions, which they themselves are at fault for."

    A little better, yes?
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  2. "I'm going to create man and woman and f*ing throw them in a lake of fire if they don't believe that I exist, because I'm God and I can do whatever the F* I want!"
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  3. Hilarious!

    How did Adam and Eve know that disobeying God was wrong? I've never quite got that part.
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  4. orignal sin is not a bible doctrine its man made , anyone who disagrees please provide bible verses to back up your claim that orignal sin is a bible teaching
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  5. Justin: free will to either obey or disobey? Will is only free in so far as one does not suffer significantly different consequences for choosing A over B.

    If I say that I will kill you if you do not do X, then doing X is not free will being exercised by you.

    All this talk about killing reminds me of God. The planned murderer, almost, of Moses. Can you explain that to me? Why would I want to follow someone who was staged to knock off Moses? I posed this gem of a citation from the Bible a while back (you know it - I know you do); I have yet to get a satisfactory answer from any Bibleist.

    WHY DID GOD PLAN TO MURDER MOSES? And why is that acceptable?
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  6. CKDC: It's thought that God "sought to kill" Moses because Moses hadn't circumsized his younger son due to his wife's protest. First, this was not something that was "planned" the same was as many of us think of murders today being planned out with malicious intent. It would have instead been something that God (probably reluctantly) saw as necessary.
    So, earlier, Moses had given into his wife's opposition to the circumsicion instead of doing what he knew God had made explicitly clear that he wanted. With this sin left unatoned, and since he was undoubtedly spiritually troubled by knowing (and more importantly believeing that it was wrong) that he was disobeying God, Moses wasn't fit to be a spiritual leader to others. (For one thing, it would have been extremely hypocritical of him.) Thus, it was to save the integrity of the spiritual lives of uncountable people that Moses would have had to be killed.
    Keep in mind that this would not have been something that God wanted to do or would have done had he not seen it as necessary. Also, God did NOT kill Moses here, suggesting that he knew that simply "seeking" to kill Moses would cause Moses (and his wife) to finally obey him, thus making him fit to be an honest spiritual leader.
    So, this is acceptable because making Moses think that God was going to kill him caused him to make himself spiritually clean as a leader, thus saving the spiritual lives of many more people.
    Is this a satisfactory answer? (I don't mean this sarcastically or to carry any disrespect)

    And if not...why might that be?
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  7. My belief:

    God has created all that is right and all that is wrong.

    To be right, something has to be wrong. That's just the way the world works. 1+1=2. Conversely, nothing else+1=2.

    For there to be darkness, there has to be light, or else there would just be nothingness, which is neither dark nor light which then does not exist. Conversely, for there to be light, there has to be darkness, or there would be no difference in anything, and everything would be the same: aka nothing would exist.

    For there to be good in the world, there must be evil. If one were to take evil out of the world, there would be nothing with which to classify good as good, therefore, it would be meaningless and not exist. Conversely, for there to be evil in the world, there must be good. If one were to take all the good out of the world, there would no longer be evil, because it would not exist, because it's subjective.

    Blah. That's the way the world works. Suck it.
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  8. To: Cozbi

    Thanks for your reply too... I like it.
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  9. I have seen that before, but it never fails to amuse. Always puts a smile on my face, and I thank you for posting it.

    Here's my summation of a lengthy, much more detailed one that I have written (the full thing, which is much, much longer and quite detailed (and hopefully humourous), can be seen here: http://magx01.blogspot.com/2010/06/christianity-in-nutshell-brand-new-not.html):

    Believe that the world was created by a lonely magical being 6-10 thousand years ago (so, you know, after we built the first houses, created languages, domesticated the dog and other animals, designed jewelry, etc) and that this being, after murdering nearly everything on earth in a scientifically impossible worldwide flood metaphysically impregnated a human virgin who then gave birth to a baby boy named Jesus, who was the human manifestation of the god who impregnated her (don't ask) and who, after sacrificing himself to himself in order to allow himself to forgive us for living up to our design, mandated that we believe this happened lest it be for naught and we still end up in the hell that he created, but really, really, really doesn't want us to end up in....you know, because he's infinitely merciful.
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